Hello my conscious community!
I think about sharing my experience
all the time however I miss out on opportunities to inspire others due to a
perceived lack of time or more honestly a lack of commitment. I justify
skipping it, doubting the power of positive impact my words might have on those
whom they reach. I’ve decided today that taking the necessary time required to
expose the strength I’ve gained from the lessons I’m learning, is a valid
consumption of my energy as it may contribute to helping build hope in others.
That being said… This is what’s
happening:
Someone I have known for a very long
time, who played a big part in my decision to seek out and stick with a
lifestyle based in *sobriety, messaged me this morning, "Two days no weed.
Going to take it one day at a time- thanks for being so kind- several times
you've blown my mind- you're presence is so divine- The Fog is one of a kind-
I'm proud to see u shine.."
Surprised that this particular person
happened to be reaching out at this point in our relationship, I found myself
sharing quite a bit more then I realized I would. Considering how this
encounter began, what develops from here resulted in an outcome which was
completely unpredicted by me at this point.
As a response to such text I was compelled
to express, "Thank you for sharing this part of your journey with me.
The fact that you're willing to be willing is huge.
Getting support from others
who know the feeling of being dependent and addicted to using, really saves me
in my moments of weakness as much as it fuels the devoted pledge I’ve made to
myself to live in full consciousness. There are narcotics anonymous groups
as well however I've found pretty much everyone in AA has had to overcome weed or
some other addiction along with alcohol. For that reason, here in AA, I've
found a place where I can truly be honest with myself, others and my higher
power to evolve and heal my past habits, giving me an opportunity to create the
life I most desire while overcoming resentment, fear and shame.
I've learned that *sobriety is
extremely fragile- and must literally be guarded with our lives in order to
truly know the authentic animated events we are here to experience. Picking a
"birthday" of when your true, conscious, honest self was or is born
stands as an extremely motivating factor to stay the course of which you
affirmed! So, if you are still going strong when this reaches you then yours
would officially be 11.5.12? My advice would be to find the exhilarating power
in clearing what blurs your direct connection with source energy, our higher
power, your God. I see that “using” mind-altering
substances of any kind clogs the path of this divine relationship, which seems
to stand as highly essential for one to have a positive experience during our
physical life on this planet.
“Using” is holding us back from our grand
design's purpose on this planet. The longer you stick with honest *sobriety,
the harder it is to go back, throw away that "birthday" or give up
the connection you develop with your HP. Like we learned together a long time
ago... Changing your mind is changing your life. By admitting you are powerless
over weed and praying to your God to
guide you away from it, you can find it easier to focus on that which is
serving your well-being instead of giving in to that addicted voice in your
head that's just stuck playing the same old self-sabotaging tapes over and over
again. When agitated or doubtful, pause and pray-
your natural instincts, your higher power, knows the way to your greatest state
of fulfillment. Your "God could
and would if he were sought.." Believe and you will be relieved. Try
thinking about your thoughts as if they are birds.. Whichever birds you feed
more are the ones that will hang around longer. See cravings as simply strange
birds that fly over head- you would never in your right mind try to capture
these birds and hold them captive thinking such an act would serve either of
you, so instead all you do is observe their presence and let them fly away. Now
as you decide which birds of thought are helpful for your *sobriety and your
happiness, you can then put out a feeder or have food ready on hand for the
healthy thoughts that fly in, feeding those you wish to keep close.
|
"Birds Are Flying Over My Head.." By: Chloe Gauntley |
As you
continue this behavior these bright, motivating birds will grow in number,
until the strange birds of addiction are shunned to the point that they no
longer even come around or if they do it’s only stay for a brief appearance
before you’re focus is consciously redirected to that which you Love. One day, one moment, one choice at
a time."
After what I considered to be such a
thoughtful disclosure I was given the reply of, "Thank you for your
time." Really? Okay. I see how so much
stimulating information at once could be overwhelming to some, especially in
the first stages of honest *sobriety. So when I could have given in to being
offended, I dug deeper to find a place of gratitude in heart and said,
"Thank you for your recognition."
I then got a, "Your
welcome." Which part of me wanted to find as mocking or self-righteous.
However what happened next stopped me in my tracks before I could act out of
fear, that I was being unappreciated.
Even though I know it is best to
expect only the unexpected, I was letting myself feel defeated from the
response I was given. Then literally the very next minute like a stampede of guiding light,
I received another text from someone else that read, "I believe in the power of words........so here goes.........I
hope and pray that every one of your goals and dreams in life come true. I hope
that you continue to find your true purpose and that your work inspires people
of all walks of life. That your life is looked at as a life to follow after
because of what you stand for. May God's hands bring you more joy, love and
happiness then you have ever dreamed of......I hope and pray you have a family
of your own that gives you a new meaning of life....and I hope that you meet
and embrace new friendships that lead you to your calling and let your light
shine on this world like you have never imagined .........words are the
strongest thing in the universe....I believe in yours...say you receive that.....talk
soon.....cheers to that."
What a difference a moment makes eh?!
As soon as I started to feel agitated
and doubtful I was immediately confronted by the wise advise I’ve heard time
and time again and in fact had just minutes ago given out myself, that in such
instances the next right action to take is to PAUSE. I find such validity in pausing,
that by doing so I give myself that extra moment to think, breathe, pray,
quickly meditate on how to proceed with Love and grace which pushes me to
reconnect with my code of honor instead of reacting
out of hast or defense.
I passed this new message on to whom
I was originally conversing with and in sharing what I was given I then
acquired a texts stating, "That brings joy to my heart, thank you."
Along with acknowledgment that I had been a positive influence in the
prosperity this person is currently collecting.
As a result I decided to communicate,
"You have a unique gift when it comes to expressing yourself with music.
A
talent that comes so instinctually for you, takes others years of training to
parallel. I truly believe that if you become addicted to recording music every
time you feel the urge to smoke or drink and you start to record instead of
“use” in each of those instances, that within a year you could have at least 1
song on the radio. That between now and your first “birthday” you will be well
on your way to having the freedom you desire of traveling any where in the
world you'd like, enjoying a comfortable car, your own home, world wide welcome
and respect.." No matter how my message is going to be received, this is
my truth and I find immense gratitude for the courage I have to let it be known
and even greater appreciation for the platform I was presented with to give
such recognition without denunciation.
At this point I'm given the gift of
validation, "I appreciate your words of wisdom." As I receive such a
response simultaneously to the reply I am constructing for the friend who
chimed in during my moment of pausing. I told this sweet friend who so openly
contacted me out of the blue, "Thank you. Your time, attention, honesty,
reflection, drive and expression have touched my heart this morning as a true
blessing. My am I feeling aligned. I had just responded to a friend who is
attempting sobriety with very detailed feedback and got back what I perceived
as a lackluster reply.. One minute later I got this message from you! Thank you
for inspiring my patience and challenging me to give all people the tools to
create their desired reality while then stepping back to allow space for each
to build their own masterpiece. I do believe my life's purpose is to motivate
others, inspiring courage in them to live as their truest self and at their
highest potential. I am striving, on moment-to-moment bases with each choice I
make, to be of service by leading through positive example. I feel honored
you're 'seeing' me and allowing me the gift of your reflection to remind me the
power my inner light holds and the ability to recognize the positive difference
my expressed authenticity makes on this planet. I feel validated by your
vulnerable share that I am doing the right thing and must stay the course...
Thank you! Ps. I too Love words!"
I have been saying for some time now
that ACTIONS SPEAK THE LOUDEST, so to hear someone put such weight on words is
a reminder how words in all reality can stand as a form of action themselves. I
have struggled with this concept for a while, knowing my words effect others
yet finding some people’s words to be empty of dignity only to leave me feeling
fooled once again for believing in them. I might now have faith that honest
words represent pure intentions, which therefore are manifesting into allied
behaviors and it may only be lies that breed this lack of satisfaction when
counted upon. Have I discounted all words due to the misuse of irresponsible
people who are living out their age in denial? As I questioned my stern
commitment of letting words simply sound good when in fact I was actually only
watching what actions I could see, I heard more from my enlightened friend
that's got me digging deeper for answers to such inquires about the path I have
been so diligently traveling.
"Your mind is ready for the real
good stuff.....I'm going to share with you some amazing things in good
time....I'm reading where science and scripture are working together to teach
how much power words have......I've been taught this my whole life....my mom is
a life coach and teacher to actors and models......I've been blessed .......you
and me....our friendship is about to blow your mind........hope u have a great
day....you have one of the best smiles I've ever scene in this world
......thanks for being you...." What a pleasant recognition of all I have
been working toward.
I am able to feel at peace in this
now that I am in the place for which I am meant to be. I feel inspired to focus
my attention on what is really important to my spiritual growth. I am ready to
publish what I am learning, instead of wasting energy doubting if I am being
understood. By staying aware of how I am affecting others and keeping faith
that through my complete consciousness I have the power to adjust my own
responses accordingly, I am being an active participant in creating my desired experience
through the good guidance of my high power.
I affirm: "I Love myself more
today then ever before. I know now, with complete certainty and faith, I am
truly worthy of being Loved. That by making it to be present in this very
moment, I see how all that has happened before now is meant to be. From here
on, whatever comes next is quite a mystery. However, what I am sure of is that
I'm ready, willing and able to express what's true for me in each coming moment
without shame, fear or insecurity. I find strength in believing that everything
happens for a positive purpose if that's the perspective I pick!"
Thank you for allowing me this time
with you. I pray that you reading this may in some way aid you to trust that
through sharing our sorrow we cut it in half and by sharing our joy it becomes
doubled. 1ove.
(*Sobriety: -noun. 1. Seriousness,
gravity, or solemnity. 2. Habitually temperate, free of excess. 3. The state or
quality of being sane or rational, showing self discipline. 4. Refraining from
any indulgence in intoxication or alteration of one’s pure state of natural
intended existence.)